Out of Commission

Well this weekend totally sucked. Saturday night I became incredibly ill with the flu. I swear I don't even remember the last time I have been this under the weather. I was really looking forward to doing some snowboarding on Sunday but instead spent the day on the couch, sipping ginger-ale and watching movies from the 50's. I promised myself that I would board a lot this winter and so far I've only been once. I was really excited to go this weekend and then the flu totally betch slapped me.

I am (for the most part) recovered now and will hopefully be back to 100% tomorrow. I've realized that I need to be more active with this blog thing because when I am, I feel better. I've been putting this whole 'who I really am' on the back burner the past couple of weeks. I think I keep making excuses for not advancing in this whole coming out process. For example, I tell myself that once school applications are completed or once I find a job, that I can focus on coming out. I really want to tell my sister, but she is going through some stuff in her life and I think that maybe I should wait until she deals with her own issues. I realize that these are excuses, yet am unable to grow the balls to change my situation. Damn.

Maybe I'm just emotional right now. I found myself tearing up in 3:10 to Yuma on Sunday when watching it with my family. I'm not really a fan of Westerns and I NEVER cry in movies, but I think my weakened bodily state played a factor. As an aside, I recommend watching the movie - it has Russell Crowe and Christian Bale, and overall it wasn't bad.

Anyway, I want you all to know that I really am a fun person. In "real" life I'm always laughing and joking around and I try not to take things that seriously. I guess this blog just gives me a place to vent and talk about some serious personal stuff going on in my life. Here's to hoping for a good week. I promise more posts will be on their way soon!